Why the strange title?

We all have heard them. If you are a mother, you have already used several of them on your children. It's the "momisms". We catch ourselves smack dab in the middle of "I will turn this car around!" and roll our eyes at the realization of what just came out of our mouth. It's like something inside of moms everywhere is pre-programmed with the automatic response to an open door of "Were you born in barn?" I remember as a kid thinking, "what a dumb question, mom. Weren't you there?" You would think that after hearing all of those sayings that were deemed absurd as a child, we would not be bound to repeat the nonsense. But, alas, I still can't help but remind my children of how things were "when I was a child" in an obsolete attempt at helping them understand how blessed they are to live in these times.

Now maybe it's just because I was such a perfect kid, but there seems to be a whole set of other "momisms" that I do not remember ever hearing my mother say to me. There are times that I hear something coming out of my mouth and think how incredibly strange I must sound yelling at my child over and over again to "STOP drawing on your vagina!" And everytime I have to say "stop licking the back door" I wonder if I'm coining a new momism, or if I should call the pediatrician. How many meltdowns do you suppose I'm going to have before my children realize "crayons aren't candy!!" and "tampons aren't for your fingers!!" or that they have to"stop putting nail polish on your eyes!"

But out of all of the crazy sayings that exit my mouth, old and new, the most common phrase uttered by many a mom around this house is "WHERE ARE YOUR PANTIES??" So when I was trying to decide on my new blog title, that was the only one that sounded appropriate.

Here's to all of the mommies out there that are looking for panties right now! Look in the toilet. That's where I usually find them.